Art Lesson No. 96

Last night was one of those nights. Good company, good food, good conversations... in a rather unconventional setting with my house a total mess, the studio next door being renovated, and other aspects of life in a mish-mash.

Awie was there to help Zane with his new studio. Then Qalam and Bashir arrived to join us during dinner. Conversation flowed -- mostly about art.

In the midst of tinkling laughter (mine) and clouds of smoke (theirs), Qalam turned to me and asked quietly, "Are you happy here?" But the way he asked it was as though he already knew the answer. I just said, "Yes!" and thanked God for having Zane, Musa, this house, the studio, our art, and even the small things like the garden table Zane made, the pergola, our junk car, the food before us, etc.

We talked about future plans, dreams, artists, and paintings. We talked about their recent Penang trip, Zane's new studio next door, about Musa's painting.

Then, Zane brought out the writeup I did for Lautan Tiga, the upcoming three-man show he's doing with Tuan Azhar and Mie Pak Lah. He asked Qalam to read it. I was horrified! My first reaction was to lunge forward and grab the piece of paper out of Zane's hand. Instead I shrugged my shoulders, put on my infamous poker face, and cringed inside. Let the crit session begin, I thought...

-- because Qalam is such an educated, literate, intellectual person, with deep philosophies, thoughts that never stop running in his head, a keen observer, and has profound perspectives and opinions on many and all things. He's one of the heads in fine art at a local university, he paints, does installation works and sculptures. He's a curator and writes about art. He reads a lot, too -- his house is full of books of every kind -- from bibles to Quran, from classics to children's, from trash to everything else. And that's how I know he's well-read --

So yeah, I felt a little unworthy.

Well, he read it quietly...and worse still, didn't say a word when he finished. Probably trying to think of something nice to say, but coming up with zilch! Oh, God...

Then he came up with this: "Good. You wrote about the artists, their backgrounds, their experience..."

I knew it wasn't a compliment and waited for the inevitable "But..."

But it never came, well not immediately.

About half an hour later, in the midst of talking about something else, he inserted the "But..."!

"Maybe you can explain about their current works. Don't get stuck writing about their biographies because we already know that. But their works, now that's something new, fresh."

Made sense.

Then, another half hour later, he took out one of Zane's abstract works and said: "When the artist has signed his work, he's ready to show it to the public. And that's when you come in as the viewer to interact with the painting. The painting no longer belongs to the artist; it is open for the public to interpret it anyway they want, and the artist has no say already."

Just like how an author can no longer be possessive about her novel once it has been published, marketed and read by readers, I thought.

Then, he took on the stance of a lecturer (because he is one in his day job), and started making an example of Zane's work and how I could write so many things about it.

"At first glance, this looks like an abstract work. But then, you can see that it has elements of a landscape painting, which is natural because we know that that is what Zane 'suka buat; dia punye suka.' The warm swirls of colour here -- they look like a sun. The lines here suggest growth, ferns growing. The central colours here are perhaps the jungle. And everything is on a horizontal plane, suggesting some kind of landscape.

"The whole feel of the painting is very 1980s...the colours chosen, the content. During the 80s, Malaysians, and a lot of artists were obsessed with budaya, kebangsaan, trying to find their Malaysian identity. In that context, perhaps the ferns here represent Zane's own ideas of identity, of his kemelayuan."

He had a lot to say, but he took his time saying it. I'm glad that despite feeling a little inferior about my writing, I was able to put those feelings aside and be open to what he had to say. I think in terms of writing on art, he could be my mentor. He suggested that I take up a course on art history, and Zane was all for it, too.

So this turned up to be a long post because I don't want to forget it. Last night was a wonderful moment. One of those things that you just never planned for. And even though my life is full of glaring imperfections, I'm glad that with Zane in my life, and all the things that come along with him, I am able to appreciate the more enriching aspects of my existence in this world.

Serendipity

Sometimes in life, we stumble upon something we never set out to find...and yet, it finds us.

This morning, I had packed quiche for my breakfast into an Ikea tupperware. The plastic storage had some unfamiliar symbols on the bottom, so I wasn't sure if I could pop it into the micrwave for re-heating.

I tried googling "ikea microwave oven safe symbol" and that got me to a blog kept by an American wife/mom/grandma who, from the looks of it, loves journaling, scrapbooking, quilting and making crafts. She posted an Emily Dickinson poem which I just melted for. Read it and just relish the words on the tongue. This makes me wish I had studied literature in college.

I love the first and last line of the poem.

I Dwell in Possibility
by Emily Dickinson

I dwell in Possibility –
A fairer House than Prose –
More numerous of Windows –
Superior – for Doors –

Of Chambers as the Cedars –
Impregnable of eye –
And for an everlasting Roof
The Gambrels of the Sky –

Of Visitors – the fairest –
For Occupation – This –
The spreading wide my narrow Hands

To gather Paradise.

And now, some words on the concept of serendipity (also taken off her blog):

"Serendipity visits all of our lives at some point. You begin by going left, take a sudden right and find yourself someplace unexpected. Sure, some people know almost from childhood the path that they will take and map it out. Most of us, however, are a little softer in the life plan department. You think: This is the thing I will do, then encounter something unexpected and find yourself in a new place altogether."

Linda Richards

"Serendipity can be developed, as an attitude of the mind and as a quality of the spirit. It can energize and excite our lives and give us balance between structure and spontaneity, between flat, fixed firmness and free, fun flexibility. It can allow us to “get there” and to “enjoy the journey” at the same time. It can tap us into a higher, clearer reality andinject joy into what is no longer the routine.

On a more serious note, serendipity of the spirit can be an attitude whereby our lives become divinely guided rather than self structured. Serendipity of the spirit can become the connecting bridge betweenour goals and God’s will."

Richard Eyre

By the way, the movie of the same name, starring John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale, was and still is one of my favourite romantic date movies!

So folks, sometimes in life, we stumble upon something we never set out to find...and yet, it finds us. While what we've been searching for all our lives, remains elusive.

I still have no clue what that darn Ikea symbol means!

Moses and Mama

No doubt, mornings are the best...although sometimes Moses wakes me up a little too early for my liking! But that's my private time with him, while everyone else is still sleeping.

After a month being away from work and staying home with my hubby and son, I am now back at the office full-time. It's a tough adjustment because I keep thinking of these two precious guys in my life and our home life. I miss them very much when I am at the office.

My days are usually alike -- Moses and I wake up at the crack of dawn, and we roll about. He'll ask for "buah" or "bish" (biscuit). We watch TV (Cubeez and Krayon on Channel 552 because we can't afford the Cartoon Network!). We read. Then at 7:30 or 8 am, we go down and I make breakfast (he loves omelettes or bread and cheese).

He really takes after me in the way he brings food up to his nose for a sniff. Hubby says that's exactly what I do, too! I guess, for me, eating is something you need to engage with all your senses, especially your sense of smell. (Just the other day, during the mid-autumn festival, a neighbour came to Moses bearing a piece of durian. I was horrified because I didn't want him to take such a rich fruit at this age. Fortunately, Moses sniffed at it, didn't like the smell one bit and turned up his nose at it! Haha!).

Then after breakfast, we wake Ayah up and take walks around the block, visit the neighbours, go to Uncle's house and look at the fish in his pond, go for bike rides around the neighbourhood. Then it's time for Moses' bath, milk and morning nap.

While he's napping, we make lunch. He loves potatoes, fish, chicken and takes leafy veggies (Good boy!). His favourite is when I make kurma ayam. He just gobbles it up!

Moses is usually up by noon. He eats, rides his little car; gets on his horsie, Chief; we play some baby songs on the computer. Then he naps again around 2:30 or 3 pm.

In the evenings, we go for walks around the neighbourhood again, play some football, visit the neighbours, have tea (pancakes, more bread, fruits, etc.)

Evenings are quiet times. We have dinner, read books, watch some cartoons, turn on Oasis channel and listen to the doas, then tuck him in to bed.